Turkey Bingo Is Back: The Only Festive Diary You Need This December

Right then, it's December, the heating's on and somebody in the shop has already started playing Mariah. Which can only mean one thing: the festive programme at Mirfield Con Club is upon us, and if history tells us anything, the tickets will go quicker than the turkey at a Christmas Day buffet.

Here's the full rundown, plus a gentle plea to book early.

The Christmas Draw — The Big One

Let's start with the event of the season. The Christmas draw takes place on Saturday 21st December, with the drum rolling from 8pm sharp. As ever, the prizes are proper ones — meat hampers, drink hampers, cash prizes and the ever-popular top prize that has, in previous years, funded more than one family's Christmas dinner and more than one January's mortgage payment.

Tickets are on sale behind the bar now, priced at a quid a strip. You don't have to be present to win, but frankly, half the fun is being there when your number's called and watching Jean try to pronounce somebody's surname.

Turkey Bingo: A Mirfield Tradition Explained

For the uninitiated: turkey bingo is exactly what it sounds like, and it's glorious. Winner of each game takes home a full turkey, courtesy of the club, just in time for the big day. It runs on Wednesday 18th December, eyes down at 7.30pm, and it gets busier every single year.

New members are very welcome — the caller is patient, the dauber pens are provided, and nobody will judge you for missing the outer edge on a full house. Much.

Quiz Night Goes Festive

The weekly quiz gets a Christmas makeover on Tuesday 17th December, with a festive picture round, a music round that will absolutely include a Slade singalong, and a prize table padded out with mince pies and bottles of the good stuff. Teams of up to six. Entry is £1 per person, all of which goes back into the prize pot.

Fair warning: the current champions have held the title since March and are insufferable about it. Numbers needed.

New Year's Eve — Stay Local, Stay Merry

Now for the big question: where are you seeing in the New Year? Because before you commit to town, consider the maths. A taxi into Kirklees town centre, a queue in the cold, entry fees, and drinks at city prices — versus a ticket at the Con Club, where there's live entertainment, a disco till late, a buffet at midnight and a bar where the prices won't make you weep into your glass.

This year we've got a live act on stage followed by DJ into the small hours, party poppers at midnight (health and safety has allowed it, just about) and a raffle at eleven to keep the suspense going. Tickets are £5 for members and available now from behind the bar. Last year sold out by the 27th, so don't dawdle.

Booking, Tickets and the Practical Bits

• Christmas Draw — Sat 21 Dec, 8pm. Draw tickets £1/strip, on sale now.
• Turkey Bingo — Wed 18 Dec, eyes down 7.30pm. Pay on the door.
• Festive Quiz — Tue 17 Dec, 8pm start. Teams of up to six, £1pp.
• New Year's Eve — Tue 31 Dec, from 7.30pm. £5 members, tickets behind the bar.

Doors for all events open half an hour before start times. If you're bringing guests who aren't yet members, sign them in at the door as usual — or better yet, get them signed up properly before Christmas and make it their local too.

Why Bother With the Club at Christmas?

Because Christmas is really about the same things the club has always been about: familiar faces, a warm room, a decent pint and nobody charging you a tenner for the privilege. You'll know the people at the next table. Somebody's nan will be on the dance floor. The buffet will run out of sausage rolls because it always does, and that's part of the charm.

So dig out the diary, grab your tickets, and we'll see you down the Con Club this Christmas. First round of mulled wine is on nobody in particular — but it's cold enough out there that somebody will probably crack.